Friday, 27 September 2013

If this tickles your French Fancies just have a little download for the weekend.
1) Run that luxury relaxing bath you've been promising yourself all week.
2) Pour that wine you soooooo.... drastically deserve and instead of going POP...
3) Get down with Poppy!
Amazon Bestsellers Rank: #8,299 Paid in Kindle Store

‘Good party, was it?’
‘Poppy brought a man home last night, she pulled good and proper,’ Paige informs Victoria.
Victoria looks at me with surprise. ‘You did? That’s great. Who is he? What’s he like?’
‘His name’s Jet Harrington and he’s a grip.’ Paige tells Victoria. ‘He’s six-feet-four and—’
‘All right, motor mouth, may I comment on my own life?’
‘What’s a grip?’ asks Victoria.
‘A lighting and rigging technician,’ replies Paige, ‘and his rippling physique is the most impressive thing about him.’
‘Paige!’ I’m exasperated. ‘I can take it from here, why don’t you make yourself useful and order breakfast?’
She pouts but gets up to order. ‘But you can’t start talking until I get back.’
Victoria and I grin at each other.
‘Right, tell me everything,’ she demands excitedly.
I tell Victoria how I met Jet, his funny wig, his bet not to let go of my hand all night. I mention how comical and tall he is. I skip over the bit about having sex in the cupboard. I am definitely not giving them any potential ammunition over me.
Then Paige is back with our coffees giving me the evil eye. ‘You started already.’
‘It’s nothing you don’t already know,’ I say, picking up my coffee. For a few minutes we all focus on blowing the steaming vapours away before the first sip burns our lips.
‘It’s not fair,’ says Victoria, shaking her head. ‘I haven’t met anyone in ages and Poppy comes straight out of a relationship and bang straight into another.’
‘And bang him she did,’ Paige says cackling.
I roll my eyes. ‘I’m not having a relationship.’
‘Are you going to see him again?’ Victoria asks.
‘I don’t know. I don’t think so,’ I shrug.
Our breakfasts arrive and for a few moments we eat in silence. Then Paige looks likes she’s burning to ask me something.
‘Just wondering what was it like?’
‘What was what like?’
‘You know, was he good in bed?’
‘Was he well endowed?’
‘Tall, big hands, big feet?.’ Victoria asks eagerly.
‘Bet it was bigger than the sausages I’m about to consume!’ says Paige.
‘Hope so, I don’t trust a man who is smaller than anything I eat,’ says Victoria.
‘Like a nice deli sausage, all hand-made and thick.’
‘Mmm … extra tasty.’
They’re both laughing helplessly at themselves.
Sometimes my best friends can be so juvenile.
‘Can we change the subject about my love life?’
‘Oh c’mon, Pops, it’s a momentous event. It certainly wasn’t happening with Mr Politician, nothing remotely exciting like this. All right lets talk about … how’s your job?’
I groan. ‘Let’s not talk about work either.’ 

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